Finally I’m back at my job! That’s great…it really is. Can’t way to go back to my lovely workplace and enjoy myself. Eh…well… More like I can’t wait to worry less about money. If I… More
I was listening to Residente’s Apocalíptico on YouTube yesterday, and I couldn’t help but think about its message and the situation humanity faces right now.
In the song he describes the state of the world as it faces its inevitable end. Not like I believe this is the end of times, but it sure is a test for humanity.
Last time I went to Walmart it was a week before the lockdown here in Orlando, what an error I should’ve known better. I feel so silly now that I think about it, why did I even thought it was a good idea to go to Walmart when people are fighting over toilet paper?
Anyways, I strolled down, more like squeezed myself in between carts full of items that I’d like to say were all containing different household items, but many seemed to be the same item duplicated by three.
I was only there for toothpaste, only to find empty shelves with one brand of toothpaste left: Sensodyne. Not even in desperate times people will pay $6 for a tube of fluoride.
A guy came to the aisle, he was holding a single soap bar tightly in his hand and, after putting his hands in the air with defeat, said “Are you kidding me? Not only soap but toothpaste too?”. He bent and found some in the last shelf and told me there was one left. I grabbed it and ran to the vitamin aisle.
Again I was facing empty shelves. There were barely iron supplements left. Really? Does anyone else suffer from anemia like I do? Apparently so.
I left immediately after that. With only two things in my bag, feeling like the only sane person in Orlando at the moment.
If only a stranger and me were the only ones calm in the whole Walmart, what does that have to say about humanity?
I spent too much time working as a customer service representative*, I’ve seen people lose it over the silliest shit. I’ve seen people be awful for not reason other than to step on you, or because they enjoy spreading their misery. And, one thing is to be angry because you’ve had a bad day, but another is to treat others as garbage because it’s a habit you’ve created and now it’s too late to be fixed.
I have seen and experienced so little and yet it feels like a lot.
It feels as in all the disgusting side of humans is deeply rooted in their souls and there is no retreat that can save them. No mountain in the Himalayas that can change them for the better.
I put my grain in this world everyday. I’m as eco-friendly as I can be and I make sure everyone I talk to feels listened to and appreciated.
Still, I don’t understand how others can be so selfish in every single aspect of their lives. How they act like animals as if they had no ability to rationalize. Unable to stay calm and let compassion be the base of their decisions.
But then again I’ve seen people act in their rawest forms so why am I even surprised anymore.
I have to do as Residente’s song message and wait for the end with arms wide open. Because after all, we humans will be here to behold all the damaged we caused
End of rant.
It’s that time again….
Time to visit the beach and recharge batteries.
Let the sea take my worries away.
We all have that one safe place to go, for me that’s the beach. And this might be because I grew up in an island and going to the beach is the furthest getaway we can go without taking a plane.
Every time I visit the sea it’s a subtle reminder of how immense the world is, how infinite the sky seems, and how tiny I am compared to them.
For a moment, I forget that my life back home is chaotic sometimes, or painfully plain at times.
It’s the only place I can calmy close my eyes and listen to the come and go of the waves, the smell of the salty air reminding me of everything good that exists within myself.
That I’m salty af, but I sure feel nice.
I often wonder if we’ll work non-stop all of our lives.
We sacrifice ourselves in order to obtain material stuff, to go on vacations, to get tattoos, but most of our days we spent doing a mindless, meaningless job.
And the days we do “rest”, we have a thousand things to do before actual relax time. A moment that never comes because there aren’t enough hours in a day.
There aren’t enough hours in a lifetime it seems.
Will we ever regret this lifestyle that we’ve fallen into?
I know, it’s been a long time since we don’t post anything.
We died for a moment, but we’re back and ready to improve some more. 😉
A lot has happened during these past few months in terms of jobs, relationships, mental health, and life-changing decisions. While there are different reasons we stopped blogging, there’s one in specific that affected us the most.
The most important reason being our own mental health. When we first started this blog we wanted a place where we could share unconventional coping skills, while at the same time developing a new perspective about mental health.
But we quickly found out, that the more we focused on ways to help ourselves, and others, the more aware we were of the condition of our minds. The more ups and downs we had on our daily lives. So we stopped for a moment because…
….being able to help others can only be successful once you’ve helped yourself.
It was like the roller coaster stalled at the bottom for what it felt like an eternity and then it slowly went up. We were left hanging there at the top…waiting for the drop.
The drop happened faster for Astrid, less intense than usual.
However, I’m still there. Hanging with my arms up, feeling the adrenaline run through my body. A mix of fear and excitement. I thought going back to writing about mental health could potentially jeopardize my own mental health.
Nevertheless, here I am. Willing to find out what happens when it drops.
We will pick up our blog one more time, although it’ll be full of our own experiences rather than self-help articles, there’s a lot of exciting stuff coming up in our lives and we’d like a place to log that into.
Whether someone reads this or not, it’ll be a journal of self-improvement and dreams. Of thoughts and fears.
A place for us to look back and say “Damn we’ve come a long way.”
Stay tuned. pineapples! ❤
Does anyone else feels oddly creative after going through a depression episode?
I know I do.
I have promised myself over and over not to write when I feel my worst. The words that come out of me are often miserable, and they don’t make me feel any better when I read them later. So, I restrain myself from writing anything at all. But the problem is, when I feel extremely happy, words hardly flow out of my mind.
It’s like I’m so content with my life that I just want to dumbly stare at the sky and sigh, “Ah, life is good.”
I’m utterly useless at this stage.Continue reading “Can Depression Affect my Creativity?”