It has been quite busy these past few weeks. Busy all the time! Non-stop. Today, I was finally able to keep my day off and not run to pick up extra hours. I slept in, relaxed in bed and then looked at my phone. After less than 10 seconds, I saw an article about an actress I really like and admire: Evan Rachel Wood. I clicked on the article and was immediately drawn to it.Read More
I love dressing up! There’s no way around it and everyone that has seen me for more than once is well aware of this fact. No one tells me how to dress or how to blend into the walls anymore. It has become part of my identity and one way I express myself in my daily life.More
As this year comes to an end, we all start to feel the pressure of reflecting on the goals we had in mind at the start of the year; only to find that we failed to accomplish most of them. It’s easy to get lost in thought and freak out because we didn’t lose the weight we wanted, we didn’t travel as much as we desired, we never signed up for that paint class or dance class or we didn’t improve our social interactions.
It’s the most wonderful time of the year! It’s the holiday season! So many parties, presents, decorations and mainly so many happy people…
This is what you get sold all around once this season comes when the reality can be so much different. I used to love the holiday season, for me being always about the thought of spending it with loved ones and create with them lasting memories.
All that changed for me a few years back when the person I was with made me feel guilty about getting excited about so many things I loved and enjoyed, one of them being the holiday season. He always said he didn’t like to celebrate it and that he only did it for his kids, but never cared to celebrate it in any other way. This was the mindset I was in for four years. I succumbed to just forget about it since I had no energy to try and fight with him and celebrate on my own. Overtime I let the depression take away those silly things that I enjoyed.
Now I’m slowly healing and working on that inner “Grinch” left in me. I want to stop feeling guilty about celebrating the holidays the way I always felt like. For me it was never about religion, or buying material things. I lived for the promise of spending time together with people I loved; from my blood relatives to my chosen family of friends. This year, the guilt has diminished enough that I was actually excited to put the tree up with Khey. We had a blast trying to decide where to put things and how to make it look. It was fun to disconnect from the world and just be us, silly girls trying to figure this out together. These are the kind of memories I identify with the holidays.
Happy holidays! My Holiday Spirit is back and ready to have more fun memories without feeling guilty about it.